Thursday, March 11, 2010

I Do it Because I Like to Get High

Every time it's the same thing.

to myself: Kelly, get your butt up and just get it over with. Just do it! Put on your shoes and walk out the door.

I'm not someone who looks forward to running. I'm always wondering why I do it when I'm out there. I don't live in a neighborhood that has great scenery. It's fairly new so all of the trees could still be accidentally mowed down while trimming the lawn. I'm not complaining; just telling you how it is.

My idea was that I would finally be able to run a mile and then quit. Hey, I had met my goal, right? But then I got going on this Couch to 5K program and I don't want to quit. I want to be able to say "I graduated. I'm C25K alumni Class of 2010."

I'll be finishing up week 7 tomorrow (Friday) of C25K. Only 2 weeks left. Then what? Will I keep running? The answer fascinates me: YES. But why would I keep doing it? I think it's because I love the runner's high I get afterwards. That feeling of pure euphoria and peace and happiness and energy. The endorphins rushing to my brain to try to talk it off the ledge after going through something painful and torturous.

I love running the 5K so I get a tee shirt that says "I pushed myself and this shirt proves it." Plus that great feeling afterwards.

It's a good high, the runner's high. It's not something that will cause you to read about an 80s movie star tragically dying from overdose. No, this is a healthy high. And I crave it more than a chocolate chip cheesecake brownie. I think about it while I'm running. I know that after it's all done I'm going to feel like I just popped a couple of Vicodin plus I'll be proud of myself PLUS I'll burn up those calories.

I don't run to lose weight anymore. I've made peace with my scale (which read 195 this morning!) and I'm comfortable with whatever pace my weight loss takes. My goal has shifted to fitness and along with fitness will come the weight loss if I eat right. I have all the confidence in the world that I will lose this burden. It's taken years to come to terms with myself and my goals but I finally feel good about it. I've arrived. I like me in my own skin whatever that skin may look like.

So where does the path to fitness, runner's highs and tee shirt collecting lead me? I'm not sure yet. I'm going to keep pushing myself to do better and greater things. MS 150? Triathlon? Half marathon? Run 5 miles? I don't know. The only limits are the ones I impose on myself. I've read of a man who completed a marathon who had no legs! He used his hands to scoot himself. It took 4 days for him to do it but he did it. I have 2 legs that work. And maybe I'm starting to enjoy running after all. The further I go the more I like it.

No more wars with the scale. No more stressing over losing a certain amount of weight by a goal date (except for the Pound for Pound Challenge). My goals are to take steps to pushing myself to new limits. To experience life to the fullest. To be the best wife, mother and friend I can be. To not let my mind tell me that I can't do things.

It feels good to be at peace.
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Eats and Treats

Oatmeal with 1 Tbs raw almond butter and 2 Tbs sugar free raspberry jam with fiber. So filling and delicious.
Lunch: leftover Slowcooker Southwest Chicken wrapped in low carb tortillas; Jazz apple (the best apple in the world in my book)

After letting my food settle, it was time for Week 7 Day 2 of C25K: walk 5 minutes, run 25 minutes, walk 5 minutes. The weather is certainly warming up here. I took it slow but was dripping sweat everywhere afterwards. I did it! It was tough still but I did it. Thinking of giving the Galloway method a try to see if it can help me go further.

Post run snack: Oikos Greek yogurt with honey and .5 oz of walnuts. I love this stuff so much. I could eat it every day.
Time for Turbo Jam workout: 20 minute Turbo Jam and then Turbo Abs. I always have fun doing these workouts. I look forward to them. I also get that nice post-exercise high. What can I say? I'm a junkie.

Post workout snack: sugar free chocolate pudding cup with 1/2 scoop protein powder. I had read somewhere that the Clean Eating lady, Tosca Reno, enjoyed these from time to time. I know why! It tasted so indulgent but so low cal. I'll be doing this again.

Dinner: tuna noodle casserole; broccoli with cheese sauce The kids ate up the casserole but I thought it was just ok. You can get the recipe off SparkPeople Recipes.
Rachel made my No Pudge Brownies but she added 1/4 cup of mini chocolate chips! I threatened to eat the entire batch but in the end I only had 1. So far. :)
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Overall a very good day. Clothes fitting better. Fitness is improving. Weight dropping (though slowly). Staying on plan. Have a husband who adores me. Great kids. Life is good.
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Calories Burned: 2760
Calorie Intake: 1674
Deficit: -1086

11 comments:

  1. Great attitude about running! I find it helps me to have races on the calendar to stay in shape and/or train for! I need to sign up for some more but so far I have a 10k and half marathon in 2010!

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  2. your doing so good. I admire so much that you are at peace with the wieght and geared more towards the health side. I WANT to be there too...but I have some hangup with that scale. I think once I get under 200 (11more lbs) I can find that peace...I hope and pray I can. CONGRATS on such great work!

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  3. YAY for peace
    im so happy for u
    n
    great workouts

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  4. I see a half marathon in your future.

    I'll follow you on the bike. The Harley that is.

    LOVE

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  5. You should try a sprint triathlon in 2010. I am good to go on the swim and bike ride, but the 5K part scares me. You have that part down already!

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  6. Someone on SparkPeople was just mentioning the Sprint Tris. Sounds like a lot of fun! I need to get a bike first. :) And also learn how to swim a little better. I'm kind of self taught which means I'm slow and barely stay afloat. LOL

    So many new experiences to try!

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  7. Medal Medal Medal!!!

    Fitness is fun now - isn't that weird?!? Great, great post - I so get what you mean about what you weigh not being as important as your over fitness ability.

    BTW, if we do the you-know-what, we will have to have Jeff and Chuck stationed partway through the run to cheer us on (and take pictures, of course).

    You are such a runner now - I love it!

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  8. Kelly - I can totally read through this whole post...you're happy!! All your thoughts & comments on running, the scale, losing weight....AWESOME!!! You're doing an awesome job!! Keep trucking along!!

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  9. I completely know what you mean about the running high. I like the feeling I get knowing that I CAN do the run. It's a challenge to me. Running is NOT easy for me. I'm not one of those that runs miles and miles 5 days a week! My knees and feet aren't great and so I usually don't even run more than 1 times a week (maybe 2).

    But I did my first 1/2 marathon when I was about 230 lbs! And it took me 2 hrs 55 mins! I felt great knowing I could do it. Last summer I ran my 3rd 1/2 and my time was 2 hrs 23 mins! Now that's what I love to see! I love to see the progress I made and knowing I can do it! It's such a great feeling.

    But yeah, I have the same thought while I'm running "Why in the world do I tortue myself like this!" lol

    Congrats on all your running success. Keep it up!

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  10. What a great post! It's very motivating to me. Running does make you feel so good when it's over, doesn't it?

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  11. Amanda, that's awesome!!!! I wish you would post how you trained, etc. I have so many questions. Wow, YOU'RE inspiring!

    I'd love to hear more about your half marathons. Because that's just amazing to me. Especially coming from someone who admits not being able to run miles at a time. That's me! Running doesn't come easy.
    Way to go, girl!

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