Wednesday, January 12, 2011

A Day in the Life of a Trophy Wife

Occasionally someone will ask me what I "do."  Instead of saying "I'm a housewife" I've been known to say "I'm a trophy wife."  This was especially funny when I looked like this and I always got laughs:

 And I'd say, "What's so funny?"  It was a fun little joke. :) 

I've lost some weight and started caring about my appearance a little more.  I still like to say I'm a trophy wife instead of housewife.  Just for fun.

So what does a trophy wife do? I'll use Tuesday as a typical example day.

  • Wake up and avoid the scale at all costs.  Have a sugar free Rock Star or coffee. Also a quart of water.
  • Check email and read blogs.
  • Write a blog entry about being a trophy wife
  • wake kids and make sure they're fed and I have breakfast
  • school for the kids
  • some sort of workout for me.  Yesterday was YMCA treadmill because a trophy wife does not like to work out when it's too hot or too cold.  Temperature must be perfect.
  • Decided to run a 5k with a few walk breaks. 37 minutes. A trophy wife does not need to be fast; she just needs to have cute clothes and break a sweat.

  • Have a nice lunch at home.
  • more school with the kids. 
  • strength train upper body.  Trophy wives must have nice muscles even if they are hidden by a protective layer of fat.
  • read a blog about a "one night only" showing of Hood to Coast and decide "I must go" at the last minute.  A good husband always obliges his trophy wife.
  • take a shower. A good trophy wife shaves her legs at least once a week in the winter.
  • whip up dinner: eggbeaters, turkey sausage crumbles, cheese and salsa in a low carb tortilla.  make a plate for hubby so he can eat as soon as he gets home. Don't want to be late for the movie.
  • pop a 100 calorie bag of popcorn to sneak into the movie.  a trophy wife must be thrifty on some things so she can splurge on other things.  Like stylish running shoes. Or a trip to see Wicked in San Antonio.  Or an entry fee into a race.
  • Watch awesome movie but don't open the popcorn until trip home.
  • Watch recorded episode of Biggest Loser and cheer for the other trophy wives.
  • Get beauty sleep. A must.
Exciting, yes?


  1. I got to go see Wicked on Halloween. It was amazing!

    I love your trophy wife thing. This is what it says on my Facebook page under employer:

    Evans Corp

    Vice President of Household Management & Wife and Mother · Jun 2009 to present

    I am in charge of Household Management; however those duties are overridden by my position as Wife and Mother. I’m on call 24/7 for any and all crisis from missing paperwork to counseling my subordinates. I’ve been reprimanded from time to time for neglecting my Household Management duties but I haven’t been formally written up yet. I love my boss. He’s pretty touchy feely, however I have no desire to file Sexual Harassment Charges. I was looking for another position to supplement my income; however after meeting with the President of Financial Affairs, we were able to come to an agreement that allowed me to stay on here full time. My job is very rewarding and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world

  2. You shave your legs once a week in the winter? You ARE a trophy wife! I'm not a "wife" of any kind. So I might shave my legs once a month! lol

  3. Great post Kelley. Even though my day looks different from yours, I must be a trophy wife too because I definitely shave my legs every single Wednesday in the winter.

  4. I have been looking at hood to coast and thinking of doing it next summer2012. This year I have a marathon in oct and a 200 mile 2 day bike ride in july.

    I would so provide a big slumber party atmosphere ( air mattresses on the floor after the first 3 or 4 )If a team of weight loss bloggers got together and wanted to do it with me :)

  5. You and Helen are cracking me up with your once a week leg-shaving! I shave mine twice a week. ;)

    Oh, I love that shirt. Don't you think that one team from the HTC should have had it? Although their lightening bolts were pretty awesome.

    Fun glimpse into your day. And I love that you refer to yourself as a trophy wife - I'm sure Chuck would completely agree. :)

  6. "A good trophy wife shaves her legs at least once a week in the winter"

    Ooops. I am lucky to do twice all winter LOL!

    Not a trophy wife here.

  7. Did somebody say Wicked?
    Dude - I took the money from not drinking Monster drinks and rededicated it to my Wicked fund. Figure I could afford to go around the world a couple of times I once drank so many.
    Counting the days, Miss Kelly!
    PS - ps doesn't stand for plus size any more!

  8. sent you a blogger award - go check it out at:

  9. Hi, Kelly. I just wanted to let you know that I have a blog award for you on my site. You can stop by anytime to pick it up.


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