Sunday, August 28, 2011

Scaredy Cat Edition

Friday was a scheduled rest day. Rest as in no exercise but the rest of the day was busy.

First was a gathering with our local homeschool group for Not Back To School celebration. Everyone brings something to share (I sugared up the kids with Caprisun and cookies.) and the moms hang out and the kids play.

Confession time: I'm freakishly nervous in crowds. I'm not necessarily afraid of crowds because I used to love to go to general admission concerts (rocking with AC/DC, Bon Jovi, Van Halen, etc) and push my way to the front. But crowds where I'm expected to be social scare the hell out of me. I prefer to find a corner and just sit with my head down slightly and my hands crossed on my lap.

Doing this has always been problematic for me. Many people have thought that I was stuck up. Not true! Furthest from the truth. I'm just shy in those situations.

The menacing crowd:
 They're really a nice group of people but my nerves got the best of me and I first went to the swings on the playground then eventually ventured further to sit at a table by myself. So sad. LOL 

Then a few moms started coming over to visit. Some I only knew through facebook and got to meet in person for the first time. That was cool. There were some that are friends that I haven't seen in a while and we got to catch up. I slowly started to relax and enjoy myself. One mom and I are even going out for margaritas soon.

The best part was having three people come up and tell me how I've inspired them to either take up exercising or running! That made my day.

I hate that I get so nervous like that. It's draining on me. I always feel exhausted after an ordeal like that. And I don't know what I'm afraid of. Maybe being judged? Maybe that I'll say the wrong thing? I don't know. But I am trying to work on it. Believe it or not, I'm doing better than I used to do.

I remember befriending some people in high school and more than once I heard, "I always thought you were stuck up." No! I'm really not. Just shy at first. I'm always smiling. :)

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OK, keeping all of that in mind, I had a group run scheduled Saturday morning. I'd already had a big dose of nerves with the park day. Every time I thought about that group run I'd get butterflies in my stomach. I hate to even admit it. Oh, and my running buddy wasn't going to be there.

Saturday morning comes and I chicken out. So ashamed. I have to overcome this. And I will.

I'm actually glad I didn't go for the group run. It was so hot and humid and muggy. You could see the humidity in the air. I started out with my walking warmup and before I could even start running I was sweating.

That was one of the toughest runs I've had to date. I had to pause the Garmin to throw up once. My feet felt like lead. I pushed through and finished my 3 miles in 38:31 minutes at a 12:50 pace. Avg HR 165 bpm.   I really wasn't sure if I was going to be able to finish.  Afterwards I drank electrolytes and lots of water and started to feel better. Humidity is not fun to run in. It's like running through soup. But I am proud of myself for pushing through and finishing up. And with a decent time for me!

I've decided to choose a tee shirt design to represent each run. This run's shirt:


I got cleaned up then went back out to sweat. This time to watch Chuck at his shooting match. Before he left he went and picked me up breakfast and had a big bottle of ice water waiting for me. So sweet. :)

The shooting matches have different scenarios. He loves it and he's very good at it. Here's an example of one scenario. Extreme lawncare.

So even though I had a bad case of nerves a couple of times I did have a good weekend. Sunday will be spent getting some much needed housecleaning done. Fun! You want to come over and join me?! LOL

Now for some really good news: I lost 4.3 pounds this week!! Thank you, running! And you too, strength training. I noticed my shorts were a bit looser so I thought I'd check what the wicked scale had to say. What a pleasant surprise. :)  Only 30 pounds to go!

12 comments:

  1. I can so relate to the crowd response.

    Ditto

    Cool on the WL

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  2. Aww! Happy days! :) Great loss!

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  3. Me too, Kelly! My 10 year high school reunion was a disaster. And now, looking back, I get so mad at myself for being so nervous, quiet, and shy.

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  4. I wish I could go with you to your running club's Saturday runs, just to help you get through your fears. I'm sure they really are a nice group of people and will not eat you alive... ;) And don't worry about missing this weekend - lots of people miss their long runs, so it's not like you're the only one who didn't go. Too bad it was so humid - that weather really makes it tough. I think you earn the badass award for remembering to pause your Garmin before barfing! And for continuing on!!!

    Congrats on the major weight loss! Yay running!!!

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  5. Congrats on the weight loss, Kelly. You are doing great. I don't like crowds either. Even when I know them all. I'm just more comfortable in smaller groups.

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  6. Congrats on the weight loss Kelly, that's a lot in a week, you're hard work paid off.

    I'm not good at big crowds either, I prefer small groups or one on one talks. You did go and that's something to be proud of.

    And great that you went for that run even though the conditions weren't that good. Throwing up must have been ugly though.

    By the way I just ordered Chalean Extreme. Let you know what I think of it.

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  7. I am very impressed with your dedication. And it's paying off! Yay!

    extreme lawncare... snort...

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  8. You are doing fantastic!! I know what you mean by crowds.
    Congrats on the very nice loss this week.

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  9. Congrats Kelly, that's a nice loss! I love your t-shirt too.

    You just described how I am. I am so shy. For me it is too things, my weight and I'm afraid I will say something stupid or sound stupid. That's why I usually skip events. It's sad and hopefully some day I will change. Thanks for sharing that, because I would have never thought that about you.

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  10. Hey Kelly. I want you to go back and read your blog about your first group run. You peppered it with talk abut being nervous and such, but you still met a new friend! You can meet a new friend every single time you go!! AND..you felt amazing after you were done. I know it's hard when you don't do well with crowds, but try to remember the end feeling...I think that might help you next time. We are all so proud of your accomplishments and continue to cheer you on every step of the way!!

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  11. Girl, you need to put that Garmin on auto-pause so that if you have to stop and throw up you won't even have to think about it!

    My run Saturday morning was in the pre Hurrican Irene humidity saturated air. The whole time I kept thinking how hard it felt. When I got home and looked at my heart rate and saw how hard I worked, I felt a lot better about my awful pace ;-)

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  12. Great loss!!!

    I can also relate to the social anxiety...if I am going somewhere and I know I am nervous about it, I just pretend I am in a movie. Lights, camera, action!

    That t-shirt is hilarious!!!

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