Friday, March 9, 2012

Call me Reverend Happy Texan

One thing I can say about my life is that it's always full of fun and surprises. Rarely a dull moment.
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Cops:
Yesterday I had to take the kids to the dentist for routine cleaning and x-rays. Everything is fine and Charlie has only one baby tooth left. They grow up too fast!!

Anyway, I'm on the way home in Dash (the name of the Flex and it fits him so well. His full name is Dash Daring.) and just cruising along. I get a long text from Chuck about insurance that requires a long answer back so I pull over to send the text.

I pick up the phone, and don't ask me why I didn't just call him instead of sending a text, and started to answer when Rachel says, "Um, mom. There's a cop with his lights on sitting behind you."

Crap!!!! %*@#&*! He asks if I pulled into the parking lot because I was going to visit one of the businesses there. No, I pulled over to send a text.

Officer: *long stare* License and registration.

Me: Here's my licenses (one is a gun carry permit) but I can't find my insurance. I just got this car. I swear I have insurance!

Officer: *long stare* Where do you keep your gun?

Me: I don't have it with me. I swear I have insurance.

Officer: Do you live in this town?

Me: Yes sir. How fast was I going?

Officer: 68 in a 55.

Me: No way! Really? I swear it didn't feel like I was going that fast. Darn it!!! This car is so deceptive!

Officer: Here's what's going to happen today. I'm gonna give you a warning so you don't have to pay anything. *long intimidating stare* And good job pulling over to send texts.

Me: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!

Ugh. Dash is very deceptive. It is so easy to speed in him. He's so quiet and feels so slow. Must remember to use cruise control.
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Exercise

In exercising news, I have kept up with every day of the 3.1 for 31 Days Challenge. Today was cold and extremely windy but Chuck joined me for the walk. We're talking 18-20 mph winds! Wednesday we ran but Thursday and Friday we walked.

To date, I've traveled 29.8 miles in 9 days. Every day I'm shuffling.

Before Thursday walk:

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Ants and Weeds!

We're grumbling through the last part of the Wednesday run (very grumpy runners) and a man is in his yard working and says to us, "Ant and weeds! Ants and weeds! Everywhere ants and weeds!"

And from that Chuck and I have developed a new fist bump ala Taladega Nights when we finish our walk or do something cool and say, "Ants and weeds, baby! Ants and weeds." It's no different than "Shake and bake!" from Taladega Nights.

Here's how you would use it:
"I just completed a long ass run in 30mph winds uphill both ways in the rain. And snow. And hail.
*fist bump* Ants and weeds!!!!"

Feel free to use that in your daily life.
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Eats:
I've been so good with my eats and it's paying off. The scale has been whispering sweet numbers in my ear all week. That is very motivating to me.

Here's a sampling of things that have made an appearance on my plate in the past couple of days:
Scrambled eggs with spinach, turkey and jalapenos

Grilled chicken, salad, jalapenos, oil and vinegar

Ham and broccoli/cauliflower mix

Steak salad from Subway
 I've been having a small glass of dry red wine each night and it hasn't slowed weight loss yet. While shopping for a new wine I saw this little tag. LOL "I'm great with ham!" I'm not sure why that cracked me up but it did.
 Ended up with this Merlot and it's fantastic! So smooth.

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Minister Kelly

I talked to my mom on the phone yesterday and she tells me that my brother is now an ordained minister who can legally perform wedding ceremonies. I thought she was joking so I sent some texts to my brother. I still didn't believe him and then he sent me a picture of his certificate. His words, "This is what happens when drinking and the internet mix." I was laughing so hard!! You're kidding me!!!

Hmmm.....wouldn't it be the coolest to have two ordained ministers in the family?! So I immediately became one too. I swear this is not a joke and if you want to get married I'll get the job done.

This is so awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sorry for the crappy picture quality. I don't know why I had such a hard time uploading it.

What an interesting couple of days. Can't wait to see what the weekend has in store.
Ants and weeds! So sayeth Reverend Happy Texan.

21 comments:

  1. Man I love your posts - they make me smile and I oh so want to come down there and meet you and Chuck.
    Congrats Minister Kelly - maybe Ron and I can come down there and you can marry us? :)
    Then for a honeymoon, you two can take us to the gun range for some target practice....
    You are Rockin it Kelly - so proud of you.

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    1. That would be so cool!! I could marry you guys at the Alamo (which is holy ground). LOL

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  2. I'm not sure what made me laugh harder, this post or Sandra's comment. Ants and weeds baby!

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  3. Ants and Weeds! Now I have to start talking right proper around you or I might be damned.

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    1. You better watch it, Kent. I saw your facebook picture. I'm thinking an exorcism may be in store but I'm not sure I'm qualified to do that. ;)

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  4. So the police man let the cute blonde off the hook..Good day !!!

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  5. LOLOLOL on Ants and Weeds - don't you love it when you find a gem like that?

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  6. You lucked out not getting a speeding ticket!

    Hilarious about becoming a minister. Your brother's line is too funny!

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    1. I think it's funny too. My brother has an amazing sense of humor. :)

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  7. Geesh, where were you when we had to get married for the third time due to moving countries? That is very weird getting to be a minister like that - you sure that's legal? Big mix up happened and I married my husband 3x.

    Glad you also managed to talk the cop out of giving you a ticket. It must be because you are looking so good! What a nice pic of you! You look very pretty.

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    1. Well, they say it's completely legal and people are using it to perform weddings so who knows?! If I got serious about hooking people up I'd definitely make sure it was legit.

      Thanks for the complement! And I was so happy to get away with a warning. Couldn't believe it.

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  8. Good for you - that was a nice break with the cop!

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  9. Oh man, you're right... never a dull moment over your way! Also, I definitely see a trend in your food: jalepenos galore :)

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  10. Hi Kelly...YAY for getting out of that ticket!!! Big yay!!! And congrats on the ordain-ing. Is that a verb????

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  11. hahaha love your post, Kelly. :) I'm glad you didn't get that ticket! My husband and I do the fist bump thing. Might have to add the Ants and weeds thing to it. ;)

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  12. Great looking food...your meals make me want to shout Ants and Weeds! I love me some Ricky Bobby!!! I actually went to the theatre to see Talladega Nights!

    Nice work with the officer!

    Enjoy the weekend!

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  13. Look at you! Getting out of a ticket! :) PS great job pulling over to text! Congrats Minister Kelly!

    I love that most your meals have jalepanos on them...love jalepanos :)

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  14. Dear Sweet Baby Jesus with the golden fleece diaper, thank you for making Kelly such a righteous exercise machine! Ants and weeds Baby Jesus! Ants and weeds Kelly! *fist bump*

    LOVE your posts and stories!!!

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