Monday, July 1, 2013

My Superpower: Seeing Sounds

I know, I know. It's been a while. I've been kicking back and enjoying summer which means I have left an orphaned blog to fend for itself. That's just sad. I'm a terrible blog parent. But I've sought help and will be giving it the attention it deserves. Enough summer slacking.

I have some new low carb and doctor news but I'm not going to write about all of that right now. We'll save that for Wednesday. 

I've been a happy little chick lately. There are so many little things I could concentrate on that have the potential to bring me down but I remember that I chose to be happy. I chose to look at every single wonderful thing in my life and surrounding me and concentrate on all of that. You know what? It works! Plus looking at the humor category on Pinterest. I laugh my ass off until I'm crying and I think that laughter really is the best medicine. Well, in some cases. Sometimes penicillin is the best medicine.

Chuck celebrated a birthday. I like to do things a little....differently. So instead of cake, we got fabulous cupcakes. Instead of lighting the candles with a regular lighter, I broke out my kitchen torch. Mine! I'm stingy with my torch.
 I think the rest of the night involved food and alcohol. Not sure.

We've picked up the occasional geocache but Chuck always finds them first which vexes me to no end. Joking. I'm happy for him. But I might also trip him "accidentally" next time.
 Did I mention I got contacts? So I passed my driver's license eye test and got license renewed. Yay. I'm lethal legal again.

I have been starting each day with grand intentions of going low carb all day but somewhere in there my resolve dissolves in a glass of something tasty or with a side of fries. Hey, I'm not proud. I'm just being honest.
 One night pizza was on the menu. Did you know Domino's tells you who is delivering your pizza? So I decided to make him feel welcome.
 I had Chuck answer the door which confused the hell out of Ryan because Chuck looks angry most the time even though he's not and is a super nice guy. So Ryan's smile faded fast and he wanted to know what was going on. Then I showed up at the door and told him hi. He wanted to know what was going on and how I knew his name. I explained about the Dominos tracker and stuff and he seemed ok. I may or may not have a restraining order against me and be blocked from ordering pizza again. Not sure.

I know not everyone appreciates my humor. I'm positive it even annoys some people. But it's me and I'm pretty happy with me so I don't plan on repressing it. :)

Did you know pizza tastes good for a few minutes but stays on the hips for.....years?! I remember training for my first half marathon. This is my inspiration. To get back to this and beyond.
See my belly? No, you don't! Because it's not there. I've got big plans. Big ones. I've got big ones. haha 
That was random. Sorry.

Ok, now to discuss my superpowers! A few weeks ago I had a wisdom tooth that decided to split in half for no apparent reason. It didn't hurt so I just let it go. But then it started hurting like a son of a *&#$!!! SO the dentist checked it out and said it had to go. Poor tooth. 

Today I get that tooth removed. Oh,  don't be sad for me. The dentist gives me halcion and nitrous. When I have that combination I develop super powers: I can see sounds!!! It's almost like an out of body experience. It's pretty surreal.

One side effect is that I need constant supervision after the procedure because I will remember nothing the next day. Chuck makes an excellent caretaker but he hasn't always been able to keep his eyes on me 100% of the time which has resulted in some interesting stories. Allow me to share:

1) After some tooth work and happy drugs, I decided that I wanted to go furniture shopping. I'm talking literally right after leaving the dentist. So he obliges. Somewhere in the furniture store he loses me (I'm stealthy like that). An employee approaches him and asks if he came in with a blond lady. She then informs him that I am passed out on a sofa at the front of the store. Yep. That happened. Nope, I have no recollection.

2) After another tooth overhaul Chuck puts me in the car then goes back inside to take care of paying and stuff. When he comes to the car I am hanging up the phone with someone.
Chuck: Who was that?
Me: Huh? 
Chuck: On the phone. Who were you talking to?
Me: I don't know.

Turns out someone's husband had died and I had agreed to take care of funeral service arrangements and meals and stuff. But I didn't know about that until the next day.

Today I have requested that Chuck be the guardian of my cell phone and ipad and computer. I will not be doing any of that mess again!! Because I have no idea what happens and won't remember it tomorrow.

He has threatened to video me. But I don't think he wants me to get even. ;) No video tapes!

Have yourself a great Monday. My great Monday begins in just a couple of hours. I can see sounds! hahahaha

See ya Wednesday.

9 comments:

  1. I think I will keep a close eye on you today, but I don't think I will impose a ban on devices that are connected to the internet.
    Let's just see where this goes.

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  2. Oh my goodness! Too funny!!! We did the exact same thing once with Will, our pizza delivery dude. He didn't think it was funny. What is wrong with people these days? :O Good luck with the dentist 'fun'. YUCK. I have been postponing my teeth things...thanks for reminding me. :( Glad to see you back tending your blog. Missed ya!

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  3. Oh, I do not like tooth pain at all. I am way overdue for a check-up, I should make the call today. Good luck.

    Be happy!

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  4. Wow! My dentist doesn't give me anything nearly that good! I think a blog post while you were under the influence would have been most entertaining!!

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  5. Hope your tooth deal went well today - and I'm glad to see you back posting!

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  6. laughter is the best medicene! love your post and welcome back!

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  7. Love the happy post! Glad you are back.

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  8. OMGOSH I LOVE HOW YOU WRITE.
    I adore me the random.

    xo

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  9. hahahah! You are awesome! I love that you hung signs up for the driver! And the dentist thing is hilarious. Good job giving your husband your electronics or who knows where you would end up!

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